Family Outing

We got to finally have our first family outing in Connecticut and I am looking forward to so many more.

At little bit of history first...

My family is close friends with the Savages and their son is Josh Savage. He played football for the University of Utah. He did amazing and was nicknamed 'Savage Sacks.' After the U, he moved on to the NFL. He played for a number of teams in the NFL and is currently playing for the UFL. 

Game time...  

Spencer and his buddy Cameron with Ethan
at the Omaha vs. Hartford UFL game. 

We heard that he was going to be playing against Hartford on October 16th, so we squared everything away and headed up to Hartford. Omaha won and it was a great game. It was awesome to see Josh and get to say hello. We were bummed that his beautiful wife (Maria) and adorable son (Jonah) couldn't make. We missed them but we did have a great time. 

It was way windy but we bundled
Ethan up as much as possible.

Spencer was so exited that he was finally getting the
opportunity to go to a football game with his son. He had been looking
forward to it all week and he loved every minute of it.

Thanks Josh for getting us the tickets and you had a great game. We hope that it isn't too long before we see you and your amazing family again! Love you guys and God bless!!!

(In)Sanity

I don't know what I am any more. There are days I feel I have lost my mind and then there are others where I feel I am right on track.

Not having a job is killing me. I feel so unaccomplished. I am totally someone that wants to give back to what has been given to her and being out of work has made me feel so greedy and wasteful. Now don't get me wrong here because I know that many of you who read this are stay at home moms. I am not saying that you are wasteful or greedy. I actually admire you for wanted to be home all day with your kids. I have just come to realize that I am not built like that. I have never been the one to think that I would be a stay at home mom and now that I have a kid, I realize I was right about myself. I need to work. I need the break and plus being at work (especially the type of work I do) makes me feel like I am making a difference in the world. I feel like what I have been given and the things I have been taught are being shared with others to help them better their lives and better themselves. I feel like the brain I have is being put to use each day I go to work.

However, I am SO happy that I have been about to stay at home with Ethan for at least the first three months of his life. I have been the one that has been able to watch him progress and grow. I am the one that saw him roll over for the first time. I am the one to see is his first smile. I am the one working to help him hold his bottle on his own. I have loved that!!! I am going to be sad to give that up. However, I know that daycare will be so good for him. Being with kids his age and always having activities to do will only help him progress more.

Its just tough because there are days I am calm and relaxed and feel like I could do this every day but then there are days where I do feel like I am just going to waste and I am going crazy because I am stuck at home due to having no money. I can't go experience things and see what there is to see because it takes money. Even if you find something that doesn't cost anything, it costs money (in gas) to get there. I just need to get out and I am not the only one. The dogs need out and Ethan really needs out. He is so much like me with being a go getting. We can get in the car or go for a walk or whatever and as long as he has something to look at he is happy. Just watching him roll over and things, it kills him that he can't do more than roll over. He gets so frustrated that he can't move. The dogs have so much energy and they just want to get out as see where they are and what they have around them. However, just me taken Ethan and the dogs out alone is a difficult process.

Plus we don't have a working T.V. and you come to find there is only so much to do on a computer everyday. I just keep hitting the refresh button on facebook and I check the job listings even though I checked just an hour ago. I try to find something worthy to blog about. I am running out of ideas.

I guess I will just continue to be in limbo with my (in)sanity until something starts happening with jobs. God has definitely tested my patients and showed me my limits. However, I praise him for helping me to grow and helping me to really work at bettering my relationship with Spencer. All of this has made us work at communicating more and better. It has made us take a step back from our owe situation and try to recognize what the other is sacrificing in order to make all of this happen right now. I know it has been hard on Spencer to not be apart of Ethan's firsts and I realize that I need to take on most of the responsibilities in order to give him all the time he needs to study. He has worked so hard to find a balance between school and home to help lighten the load for me. he has tried to be available as often as he can and I can't thank him enough for all that he has done. I am so happy that he is getting to follow his dreams. Now I just need to get back to following one of mine and that is working with social services.

Life Begins

Welcome back to the grind. Can I just tell you how excited I will be to have no more school for both Spencer and I? I know that in the long run it will pay off and we will be so happy that we did it but I am exhausted from it all. School has taken so much of our time AND our money. I want both back right now, please!

We are on our own. Everyone has headed home Spencer is in school full time and Ethan and I are on the hunt for a job that I can take on. I don't want to be picky but at the same time I need to be a little picky. I need something that will pay enough and that has a decent schedule so I have day cares available to me. Most day cares are open from 7am to 6 or 7pm and they are usually closed on holidays. I have decided that it could be possible for me to work graveyards because Ethan does sleep through the night but we have to figure out the transition part of me going in and getting off and whether or not Spencer will be at school. I can't have something that causes me to drive a ton because I have to look at how long Ethan will be in day care and the cost of it all. The point is there is so much to consider and it is making this more difficult then I hoped it would be. I just keep telling myself it will happen the way it is suppose to happen all in God's time. Until then I am just praying that we can make it to the end of the month.

Some probably think we are crazy for putting ourselves in this position but the fact is that we are better and stronger because of it. We are learning and growing. We are being forced to depend on each other and no one else. We have to be the support for the other even when our day hasn't been the most positive or when we are just overwhelmed and ready for the day to end so we can go to bed. Plus, I know that by Spencer doing this he is going to be so grateful when he is done. It has been a dream of his for so long to work in medicine and he always knew that he wanted to go pretty far with it. Now that he has chosen a path there is a light at the end of the tunnel and he is running towards it. I am so proud of him and I know that if it is exhausting for me then it is probably killing him. His days consist of being to school by 8am and he is rarely home before 9pm. They have him doing a lot of volunteering and then there is study time on top of that.

He is trying so hard though to find a good balance between school and being a family man. He really enjoys holding Ethan while he is studying... if only Ethan would sit still long enough for Spencer to get something done, but we wouldn't have done anything differently then what we have done. We are happy with our decisions and where we are right now. It has been an up hill battle but I really do know that it has already made us better and stronger both individually and together. 

So bring on the next two years because we got this in the bag!

Family...

It Knows No Distance

What an incredible family we have! Spencer's parents have been paying for him to fly back home to see everyone before I moved out and now my family is loading all our stuff up and driving all the way across country to get me reunited with Spencer. Our families truly know no distance when it comes to loving us. 

After my family moved me, Ethan, and the dogs out to Connecticut, they hung around for about a week to take in some of the sights. We got to go see Yale University and Spencer's school (Quinnipiac). We went and hung out at Lighthouse Point Park. I took my family to East Rock Park which is right across the street from our home and we stopped at Sleeping Giant State Park. Spencer took my dad and brother to Harry's Sports Bar and Grill, then took my whole family to Friendly's. Lastly, we drove up to Maine for some 'fresh' seafood. My family was really interested to see if it would be cheaper considering that they were right on the coast... Yeah, that was a no go. The seafood is basically the same price. It is really good though. It was nice to spend some extra time with them and really take in just being with them before they left and I couldn't just drop by from time to time. 

Amazing Race Of The Leonard's

My mom and I had a slight delay before we head the road. As you earlier read, my mom's clutch went out on her car just hours before we were to leave. There is no way that anyone could have seen this coming and trust me we did have her car taken in and worked on before we planned to leave so you can imagine how bad our mechanic felt when we were bringing it back in. He was incredible though. Craig pulled all of his guys off what they were doing so that they could get my mom's car up and running that day. He is closed on the weekends and it was Friday so you can imagine how thankful we were.

My dad and brother headed out right on schedule. They left Friday right around three in the afternoon. My mom and I hit the road running bright and early (4am) Saturday morning. My brother and dad's delay came at about that time in the morning too. They called to inform us they locked the keys in the truck and had to wait for a locksmith only to remember that Cory had OnStar after they had already called the locksmith. So OnStar unlocked the truck and the boys waited patiently for the locksmith to show up.

The trip was long but I think it is safe to say that the dogs and Ethan did better than I did. I think that I was so exhausted and didn't even know it until I sat down in the car for the long trip. Once my body realized that I was going to be sitting for awhile it took all I had to stay awake. I felt horrible for my mom who ended up driving for most of the trip.

The dogs did amazing! They did even better than I thought that they would. The only time we had to stop for them is when we stopped to get gas. No extra stops and that made it really nice. They slept for a lot of the trip. Poor Miracle decided by the time we got to Nebraska that she didn't want to be in the car anymore! She was really cute though and we got her back in the car only to get pictures like this one. . .

Faith hated being in the back with Miracle because Miracle takes up so much room. So she kept trying to jump over the back of the seat into the back seat.

Ethan did incredible. I was really, really impressed with him. He slept for a lot of the ride as well and required no extra stops either. We would get him changed at pretty much each of the stops and fed him along the way in the car. He hardly got fussy and when he did it was always just for a moment or two.

Entering Nebraska

Leaving Nebraska

We drove straight through and only pulled over at a truck stop to rest once. We spent about two and a half to three hours at the stop before hitting the road again. My mom and I each took our moments of getting turned around once. I took the wrong exit but we noticed right away, so no time lost and my mom thought we missed an exit we should have taken, however, we didn't.

George Washington Bridge

My mom HATED driving through New York and she ESPECIALLY hated the George Washington Bridge. The toll stops sucked but as bad for us as they did for my brother and dad. At one stop alone they paid around $37 to get through. My dad was great though because every time we told him where we were he would respond with "Oh, while you have about 20 minutes until ...blah blah... and then another 20 minutes until ...blah blah..." It always turned out to be much longer than 20 minutes! My mom started saying that he was on hiking time because whenever they would go hiking and ask someone how much longer until the top they were always told "Oh, about 20 minutes."

My dad and brother arrived late afternoon on Sunday and we arrived at 10pm Sunday night. Boy, can I tell you how excited I was to see Spencer though I think he was more excited to see Ethan. He walked right out got Ethan out of his car seat and disappeared back into the house. It wasn't until we had the car all unpacked that he came and found me to really say hello. We got everything situated and headed for bed.

Welcome To Our New Home!

Giving Our Love

To Everyone We Will Miss

There are so many people that have had such an impact in mine and Spencer's life and even Ethan's life. I can't even begin to explain how many people and how though Spencer and I could sit down and talk for hours about it and we would be able to say what each person has done. Therefore there is going to be a huge number of people that we are deeply doing to miss while we are in Connecticut. I did make an effort to try and get to some of you to say goodbye. There are tons of people that I wanted to get out and see but there just wasn't enough time between packing, getting things in order, and taking take of Ethan. I hope that no one takes offense I was not able to visit with you but please know that Spencer often talk about those that have blessed us and helped in making so much of this possible for us. 

(There are so many others that we were able to see but I wasn't able to get pictures and for that I apologize.)

There is one person specifically that I would like to mention. I almost didn't get the opportunity to say goodbye to her but I honestly believe that God knew my heart and knew how important this was for me. The one person that I do want to mention is my Great Grandma Leonard. She is 98 years old and living in Heber. She isn't always with it. Her stories at times are clearly her imagination at work but she does make for an entertaining woman. She has many, many health problems and most people would not have made it this far if they suffered from them. However, one thing she is bound and determined to do is to make it to the ripe old age of 100. I do believe that she will do it too. She is that stubborn, clearly its a Leonard trait. (Not that I have the trait or anything.) ;) Anyway, I had run out of time to visit with people and I still had not made it up to see her. I was near tears because she still had not even met Ethan. I was beginning to hate myself for waiting so long but realized there was nothing that I could do now. I was going to leave for Connecticut any minute... Speaking of which, where was my mother. I hadn't heard from her all day. I gave her a call only to find out that her clutch had gone out on the car and was back in the shop. It was very likely that we would not be leaving until the next day and she told me that she would keep me posted. Sweet just enough time to run a few shorts errors and then see where we are at. When I called back a little later my mother told me that it would likely be best if we just left in the morning and tried to get some sleep for now. Plus she told me that I could hurry up to see my great grandma if I wanted to and that is just what I did. I raced to Heber and visited with her for quite some time. She was so thrilled to see Ethan (She really loves boys for some reason). She seemed to be doing really well and actually had it together pretty good that day. I was really impressed. After the visit, a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders. I felt completely at ease since I had gotten the opportunity to visit with her and even more so I felt overwhelmingly blessed. How awesome is God to meet our needs and please our souls. 

Ethan's Great Great Grandma Leonard

Anyway, we love you and and we truly will miss each of you. Our hope is to get more pictures of those that we weren't able to get when we come back for visits and things. Thanks for blessing us!

Locked and Loaded

Or I Guess Loaded and Locked...

Well its official! The house is packed The trailer is locked and we are ready to hit the road. I am nervous to see how the dogs and Ethan will handle the trip but I am ready. I can't wait to be with Spencer again and I am so excited that Ethan will finally have his daddy around. It will be fun to see how Ethan takes to having two people to care for him all of the sudden. One thing that I have been dying to see though is Spencer as a daddy. He has always wanted to be a dad and the idea of kids always got him excited. I don't think that our situation was exactly what he envisioned but that is how it worked out and so we will take it.

As I sit here tonight I am taken back at the fact that I just quit my job, we no longer have health insurance (momentarily at least), and I am leaving OUR home. I have had a hard time with our house since we bought it. It is only two bedrooms and there was some cosmetic work that I really wanted to do in order to make me feel like it was something to 'show off'. However, with school and everything, we didn't make it around to a lot of the cosmetic things I wanted to do but looking at it now I see the bigger picture. The green carpet I hated so much is a memory. The facet that Spencer and I finished the whole backyard with my parents help is a memory. The first night that Spencer and I spent together as a married couple was in that home. I can tell you the time and where I was at in that house when I found out we were expecting. Our first anniversary was spent painting our guest room. All of this makes the things we didn't do seem so small. The biggest thing to me is that we did it! Spencer and I bought a home and have been able to manage all of it on our own. These thoughts made for a long night because it got me thinking about all the things I am going to miss...

I am going to miss...

Family

My Home

Work

Day Time

Night Time

The Mountains 

Ute Football

Wide Streets

Sidewalks

Utah's Grid System

Utah Snow

Cafe Rio

Rumbi Grill

Cookie Dough Ice Cream

That was just to name a few. I know there are many more things I am going to miss. 

You Want It...

You Got It...

So there were some items that Spencer and I did not need and quite frankly had NO room to take with us. We need some help in getting rid of them. Let me know if you or someone you know is at all interested.

Futon $30.00




Desk $15.00

Love Seat $50.00

Home For Rent

Our home is up for rent! If you or anyone you know is looking for a place or is interested, please send them our way. It is going to be difficult to pay rent on one home and a mortgage on another at the same time. Then we have to add in any other bills, such as utilities. 

Here's the link for the information on the home. 

http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=475&ad=12494151&cat=278

Tenets will need first and last months rent in order to move in. (The home is move in ready.) We do allow dogs with a one time $250 deposit for each dogs. We ask that the tenets are NON smokers. They are welcome to change the paint colors but it will be at their own costs...(it is pretty neutral currently).

PLEASE HELP US!!!

True Friends

Last A Lifetime

“Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.”

However, Spencer and I have done just this. We have found some 'truly great friends.' Mike and Kathryn have been such a blessing in our lives and having them around has made many experiences that much better. Spencer and Mike have been friends for ages but it got harder to keep close as they graduated from high school. I pushed for Spenc to really work on reconnecting with Mike but I can't blame Mike for not wanted to be a third wheel. Then Mike met Kathryn and the "pushing" starting coming from both sides. I quickly grew to like Kathryn and her fun, loving personality. It was great to get together with her and swap stories of how both Spencer and Mike would comment that they needed to hang out with one another more but never did anything about it. Well, what are wives for, right.? ;) We have really come to enjoy spending time together and were bummed that Spencer and I were going to have to move. I thought for sure that with Spencer leaving and the Hatchs' having their own lives it just wouldn't be the same. Boy, was I wrong! Mike and Kathryn continued to spend so much time with me and Kathryn always tried to come up with something that she didn't think was too crazy for a pregnant woman to do but it didn't stop there. Even after I had Ethan these two stuck it out. They came by one night and brought dinner and a movie for all of us. Then amazing Kathryn stopped in one afternoon to spend some quality girl time chatting it up. These two incredible friends took me to dinner and Kathryn, the doll that she is, planned pizza and then marshmellow roasting for another night. Through all of this I never once felt like they were pitying me or coming over to just see Ethan. I truly felt as though they looked forward to spending time with me and I can't thank them enough. 

It is rare to find friends like these two and it was really difficult to say 'goodbye' when we moved but we will never forget what they mean to us and the things they have done for us. We look forward to hopefully having them as visitors in Connecticut and are counting on many, many more years of fun and memories. Thanks for everything you two!!!

Rekindling A Kind Heart

I believe that friendships are much like marriages. You need to learn to fight through the good and the bad. You must learn to accept each other's faults and respect one another's differences. You must love when they can't and feel their pain with them. Pick them up when they fall and work to brush it off if they push you down in a moment of weakness. You must recognize that you will hurt one another both intentionally and unintentionally. The goal is to ask for forgiveness and be willing to give forgiveness. It is to realize that we are not perfect and will never be perfect.

I recently found myself giving up on this belief. I catch myself closing out pretty much everyone. I didn't let anyone close enough to hurt me when once before I believed that getting hurt was just part of the game. I believed that getting hurt made us stronger and over all helped in making us better people. Now I know that seems far fetched looking at this because the world is portrayed as such an evil place but for just one moment thing of the world as being a good and safe place that just have evil in it. I genuinely believe that people are honestly good. We just get caught in our lives and loose ourselves. I have had a lot of heartache and many people have let me down, causing me to think that the world truly is evil and not that there is just evil in it. I had begun believing things that I knew deep in my heart weren't true. I began to doubt myself and lost almost all optimism. Then I got a text...

Someone to remind me that things do change and people are honestly good...

Thanks for giving me a little bit of my hope back and for helping me rekindle a kind heart, even if you didn't realize that you did all that. You are a good friend and an awesome woman.

Thanks for having lunch with me, Jac!